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1. Be prepared to read between the lines.
Overwhelming politeness is observed in every circumstance. “Sorry” could mean anything from a genuine apology to a threat, and passive-aggression should be looked out for. We’re also quite tight with compliments, flouncy adjectives and the truth:
- Not bad = Very good
- Quite good = A bit shit
- How interesting = What absolute nonsense
- Oh, by the way… = Everything I have said previous to this was leading up to what I actually have to say, and it’s probably a cleverly cloaked insult
- Pop round anytime = Please don’t
- Hi! How are you? = I don’t want to talk to you, I’m just being polite
- Don’t worry = I will never forget this as long as I live
- Perfect = Well that’s that ruined then
2. Be very careful about which newspapers you read.
In short,
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